The swim team will be holding time trials from 4:00-7:00 PM on Sunday, June 10.
We’ll now take questions from the audience . . .
Q. We never hold time trials on Sunday afternoon/evening – why the change?
A. Because change is good. We must embrace change, even if it means we are considered “socialists” by certain people who don’t know what socialism is. And, more importantly, if we want to have the coaches at time trials, we need to hold them on Sunday afternoon/evening.
Q. Are any other teams coming to participate in time trials with us?
A. No. In the past we have had years where we hold time trials with another team and we have had years where we don’t. Things are a little simpler and a little quicker (and who doesn’t like quick?) if we do time trials on our own.
Q. What if a swimmer can’t make time trials?
A. We’ll be sad, but we’ll get over it. We want to strongly encourage all swimmers to come to the time trials (and their parents to volunteer to help). However, we realize that there are other things that come up, especially with it being the end of the school year. So we hope to see you there, but if you’re unable to make it, don’t worry. We’ll get your first set of times at the first B Meet on Wednesday, June 13.
Q. Wait a minute . . . you put that “volunteer” thing in parenthesis hoping we wouldn’t notice it. What do you mean volunteers?
A. Time trials are not only a chance for the swimmers to get their first times, it’s also a chance for the parents to practice making a swim meet go. Plus, without the parents, the swimmers would stand around aimlessly on the pool deck not knowing what to do. Among other things, we’ll need a referee, a starter, a gaggle of stoke and turn officials, two gaggles of timers, a clerk of course . . . the full panoply of positions needed to make a swim meet function properly.
Q. Gaggle? Panoply? What are you, studying for the SATs?
A. Mercifully, our days of #2 pencils is well in the rearview mirror. Besides, we hear that the ACT is all the rage now.
Q. Anything else?
A. Not for now, but if anyone has any questions, feel free to email Jay Matson at email@example.com. He’ll do the best he can to get you an answer!
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